Q: What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet? Meanwhile Arsenal have scooped eight trophies in that time having won the FA Cup and Community Shield four times each. She sits down with Johnny and asks him if this is really true about his dad. With Juande Ramos calling the shots back in 2008, Spurs beat Chelsea asJonathan Woodgate grabbed an extra-time winner to wrap up a 2-1 success, with Dimitar Berbatov's second-half penalty having cancelled out Didier Drogba's opener. Why do ducks fly over White Hart Lane upside down? Tottenham's partnership with Dulux has not got off to the best of starts, with the paint company mocking the Premier League club over their empty trophy cabinet within minutes of a deal being announced. Up to $10 000 in daily prizes, Five reasons why Man Utd can win a quadruple , Pepe's best assist? They have only lost once, in 1987, while winning the competition the other eight times they reached the final. Q: What's the difference between a line of cocaine and a pair of Tottenham Hotspur tickets? Q: What is the shortest book in the world called? The stadium of the North London club is one of 54 winners of the 2021 RIBA National Awards, as reported by BBC Sport. , Jon Hall (@castlefieldjon) October 11, 2017, Funny how a Tottenham man sugar cusses a west ham girl Brady on West Hams lack of trophies. Suddenly, the driver saw a Tottenham supporter walking down the road, and he instinctively swerved as if to hit him. This service is provided on News Group Newspapers' Limited's Standard Terms and Conditions in accordance with our Privacy & Cookie Policy. Why have Spurs announced that they are relaying the pitch at White Hart Lane with sheets of A4?Apparently, they can beat anyone on paper. "That's OK," replied the priest "I got him with the door." ", This fan then posted: "Whoever did this deserves a raise. Terry Venables was in charge and chose Gary Lineker to startfor Spurs up front, but the winner came via an own-goal as Des Walker put the ball in his own net. The Sun website is regulated by the Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO), Our journalists strive for accuracy but on occasion we make mistakes. The club was originally known as Hotspur Football Club. A: Next week, we'll both be watching the Champions League final on television. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. A: They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much and are only enjoyed on select occasions. 173. Spurs haven't won a trophy since beating Chelsea in the 2008 League Cup final. They aren't being funded by some oil rich Sheikh, or some American billionaire. Q: What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur fan in a suit? Harry Kane has received his fair share of trophy jokes over the years. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); Q: What do you call 5 Tottenham fans standing ear to ear? now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); Q: What does a Spurs fan do when his team has won the Champions League? And yep according to their Wikipedia; Spurs have won twoleague titles, eight FA Cups, fourLeague Cups, sevenFA Community Shields, oneEuropean Cup Winners' Cupand twoUEFA Cups. He always reacts like that when we lose a match. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. This was enough to send the West Ham fans into a furore as they tried to fire back at Sugar and question Tottenhams trophy success in return. An Arsenal fan is walking past White Hart Lane and sees three season tickets nailed to the wall. Alex is a freelance writer and a lifelong Tottenham Hotspur fan, who has been writing about his beloved club through thick and thin since 1996. Tottenham have been undergoing a phase of rebuild with Antonio Conte now at the helm of the club, tasked with bringing silverware and trophies to North London. A: Every fall they go into hibernation. Have a better joke about Tottenham to mock your mates? Jessica Amlee In other news, Confirmed: Klopp makes Cody Gakpo decision as Liverpool v Wolves lineups emerge, Austria 0-1 Scotland: Steve Clarkes men shine in Vienna to provide huge World Cup boost, https://yt3.ggpht.com/ytc/AKedOLRpbnizBpmuJLlXZxJQc24ygRz5Q44w3oO71XTL=s800-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj. A: People would pass up a pair of Spurs tickets. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. 90/91. But, as usual, he swerved back onto the road just in time. This service is provided on talkSPORT Ltd's Terms of Use in accordance with our Privacy Policy. 70/71. Gary Lineker calls Tottenham Hotspur 'awful' against Leicester City, 'Head and shoulders the best player': Gary Lineker raves about Tete, was recently offered to Tottenham, Confirmed: Klopp makes Cody Gakpo decision as Liverpool v Wolves lineups emerge, {{#media.media_details}} {{#media.focal_point}}. To inquire about a licence to reproduce material, visit our Syndication site. Q: What do you call an Tottenham Hotspur fan that does well on an IQ test? A: Shoot the Tottenham Fan. Let's try and get 350 LIKES?!?! , to which God replies, Its a shame because Ill most likely be dead by then.. What does THFC stand for?Tottenham Heading For the Championship. The Arsenal supporter prays to God, When will Arsenal win the Premier League again? , to which God replies, In 20 years. The admirer, like the first, is visibly upset, saying, Thats a shame, Ill probably be dead by then.God then turns his attention to the last man, asking, And what of you, my son? What exactly is your question? Speaking before AC Milan's return leg in the last-16 Champions League tie against Tottenham in London, he added: 'I don't like the weather there. Unleash your creativity & share you story! Career Day Another saw Dulux asked if the firm's iconic Old English Sheepdog mascot could play at centre-back, with the response offered: "He might do a better job.". What is the difference between Euro and Conte?Euro works in Europe. It marked the fourth time that Tottenham were crowned League Cup winners. Why did Jos Mourinho got sacked by Spurs?He aint that special. Why is tea so expensive at White Hart Lane?Because they dont have that many cups. Photo by Chris Brunskill/Fantasista/Getty Images. The policeman said to himself I cant let his family see him like this, so before calling them, he took the Spurs shirt off. Tottenham have their own customized version of the phrase to bottle. To Spurs a game or have something Spursed is equivalent to bottling something. I went shopping the first time I went to London.' Mourinho suffers most league defeats in his career, Kane to PSG mooted in Mbappe-Haaland 'chess game', Guardiola matches Mourinho record for CL semi appearances. Q: How do you stop a Spurs supporter from beating his wife? Having given themselves a shot at glory in this season's League Cup, Tottenham will be looking to recpature the last prize that they claimed. When is Tottenham going to win a trophy? Q: Why did god invent alcohol? Lots of effort and history has made the space. Whats the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a mosquito?A mosquito stops sucking. ", A third declared: "How embarrassing for Arsenal, that the official website has stooped to the banter levels of a twitter tween. 99/00. Little Johnny is last, and finally the teacher calls on him to talk about his dad. 25 came in 2016-17 after winning the Europa League with Manchester United. Have something to tell us about this article? Johnny comes to the front of the class. Prior to the 2007/08 EFL Cup victory, Spurs collected a number of competition victories under its belt, but most of them came a while back. A: I cry when I cut up onions Be it the home match against Leicester City in the season 2015/16 or the away match in Europa League R16 at Zagreb in season 2020/21, Spurs find a way to cheer their rival fans.In the current season, Tottenhams last-minute failure against Sporting Lisbon extended Antonio Contes dreadful champions league record. Why are Tottenham Hotspur fans so bad at geometry?Because they never have any points. Bit fucking ironic of Lord Sugar to be making fun of West Hams trophy cabinet. Q: What is the difference between a Tottenham supporter and a baby? A: Because all the cups are in Manchester. Q: Whats the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a mosquito? For more information, please see our You have a gun with two bullets. TIL the original World Cup trophy survived WWII in Italy hidden in a shoebox under the FIFA VP's bedonly to be stolen in 1966 from England, held for ransom, recovered, stolen again in 1983 from Brazil, and never found again. Whats the difference between a Tottenham fan and a broken clock?Even a broken clock is right twice a day! He then remembered the priest, and he turned to the priest and said, "sorry Father, I almost hit that Tottenham Hotspur supporter." While Tottenham remain a solid team in the Premier League and even made a Champions League Final in 2019, they have little hardware to show for it. The . I dont do it frequently, but once in a while, I like to call down to Earth and check if any of the people have any questions for me. Tottenham have announced on their official website that Tottenham Hotspur Stadium has been named among the winners of the Royal Institute of British Architects (RIBA) National Awards 2021. It was the moment that was supposed to herald a new era of success for the club under head coach Juande . Q: Why are Tottenham Hotspur jokes getting dumb and dumber? It was Tottenham's first trophy in nine years, and it was an especially important one. Result from The London Stadium: West Ham 1 (Maradona 10 minutes) Tottenham Hotspur 1 (Kane 89 minutes). They cant believe it, he has single-handedly got a draw against Spurs!They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him. Didier Drogba scored a free-kick inthe first halfto give Chelsea the lead going into the break, butDimitar Berbatov scored a penalty in the 70th minuteafter a Wayne Bridge penalty to even out the scoreline. Mocking West Ham trophy cabinet when Spurs is positively bulging! olympics. ? They then beat North London rivals Arsenalin the semifinals. Tottenhams stadium is indeed one of the finest in the world and reportedly cost 1 billion to build. Theyre shit and we cant be bothered.Maradona looks at them and says Well I know Im a bit fat and old, but I reckon I can beat them by myself, you lads go down the pub. So Maradona goes out to play Spurs by himself and the rest of the West Ham team go off for a few beers.After a few pints, they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the TV on. ", Another said: "The fact Arsenal have to put that on their website shows how threatened they are of us nowadays. The soccer outcomes are developing on the tv within the nook, "Sporting CP 2, Tottenham Hotspur 0," reads the announcer in his regular, reasonably sedate, voice. Chelsea were defending champions of the trophy, having beaten Arsenal in the 2007 final. Competitions are what give competitive football its structure. To use social login you have to agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website. When the female team held back on spending their budget on furniture and accessories, Sugar quipped: You didnt spend enough money, I think West Hams trophy room has got more in it. Spurs announced the opening of what they boasted was the largest club shop in Europe, which teed up these Gooners nicely to mock their bitter north London rivals. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. They had mounted an incredible semi-final comeback against Ajax that saw them win the tie 3-3 on away goals afterlosing the first leg 1-0 at home, but came up short in the final. The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. Q: Why don't they drink tea at White Hart Lane? Spurs drew 1-1 at the Emirates before the decisive second leg, a 5-1 victory which sent them through 6-2 on aggregate. Why should Spurs have some talks with Theresa May?They got out of Europe within 2 months. Q: What's the difference between onions and a Tottenham supporter? I'll give you a lift!" On February 24, 2008, Tottenham lifted the League Cup to end their nine-year trophy drought. A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. Were totally in their heads rent free. The new Spurs Shop at the Tottenham Experience the largest retail space of any football club in Europe will be officially open from 10am tomorrow (Tuesday). September 14, 2022, 6:44 pm A policeman was driving along one day when he saw a car in a ditch.When he looked inside he saw a deceased man with a spurs shirt on, a dildo up his arse, a pink tutu on, and a lot of over-the-top make-up. Watch popular content from the following creators: .(@ozz.ftbl), Depressed Arsenal Fan. "The Sun", "Sun", "Sun Online" are registered trademarks or trade names of News Group Newspapers Limited. A person is sitting in a pub along with his Jack Russell canine on Tuesday evening. It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does. "Climb in, Father. Theres nothing to worry about, lad, said the elderly chap standing next to himIts like the bombs during the war. Tottenham's hunt for silverware has been well-documented during the last decade as the club seeks to become a regular trophy contender in England and Europe. The Spurs boss was in a jovial mood as he collected his award despite a . Ive only had him for like 20 months.. The Englishman has joked that Spurs have now finally won a trophy. ", A third added: "We could be battling relegation and I promise I will always find time to laugh at Spurs. Because trophies are the simplest marker of success in football. Arsenal currently sit above seventh-placed Spurs in the Premier League table on goal difference, though Tottenham do have a game in hand over Mikel Arteta's men. A: So blind people could laugh at them too! A: He turns off the PlayStation. For Team which is top 6 I think it is far to say the lack of silverware is a concern when it happens year after year. Spurs Trophies & Honours | Tottenham Hotspur Club Honours Club Honours Year By Year White Hart Lane Legends The 1901 FA Cup winning team Major Honours Football League Champions: 1950/1951, 1960/1961 The FA Cup Winners: 1900/1901, 1920/1921, 1960/1961, 1961/1962, 1966/1967, 1980/1981, 1981/1982, 1990/1991 Tottenham announced the opening of what they boasted was the largest club shop in Europe, which teed up these Gooners nicely to mock their bitter north London rivals Jump directly to the content Still, modern silverware has eluded them as the club continues to forage for a major title. Goals from Dimitar Berbatov and Jonathan Woodgate saw Spurs through in that match, with the latter coming four minutes into the extra period. Football League Champions: 1950/1951, 1960/1961, The FA Cup Winners: 1900/1901, 1920/1921, 1960/1961, 1961/1962, 1966/1967, 1980/1981, 1981/1982, 1990/1991, Football League Cup Winners: 1970/1971, 1972/1973, 1998/1999, 2007/2008, European Cup-Winners Cup Winners: 1962/1963, Football League Division Two Champions: 1919/1920, 1949/1950, FA Charity Shield Winners: 1920/1921, 1951/1952, 1961/1962, 1962/1963, 1967/1968 (joint), 1981/1982 (joint), 1991/1992 (joint), London League Premier Division Champions: 1902/1903, Football League South 'C' Division Champions: 1939/1940, Football League South Champions: 1943/1944, 1944/1945, Southern District Charity Cup Winners: 1901/1902, 1904/1905 (joint), 1906/1907, Dewar Shield Winners: 1901/1902, 1933/1934, London Challenge Cup Winners: 1910/1911, 1928/1929, Anglo-Italian League Cup-Winners Cup Winners: 1971/1972, Norwich Hospital Charity Cup Winners: 1946/1947, 1949/1950 (joint), Ipswich Hospital Charity Cup Winners: 1951/1952 (joint), Costa Del Sol Tournament Winners: 1965, 1966, Sun International Challenge Trophy (Swaziland) Winners: 1983, Vodacom Challenge (South Africa) Winners: 2007, Feyenoord Jubileum Tournament (Holland) Winners: 2008, Barclays Asia Trophy (China) Winners: 2009. 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More information, please see our you have to put that on their website shows How threatened they are us! Trophy in nine years, and it was an especially important one stadium congratulate. In daily prizes, Five reasons why Man Utd can win a quadruple, Pepe 's assist... Up to $ 10 000 in daily prizes, Five reasons why Man Utd can win a,... End their nine-year trophy drought for the club under head coach Juande Arsenal fan is walking White! With Manchester United before the decisive second leg, a spectator suddenly found himself in the world and cost! You 're going to need help, and he instinctively swerved as if to hit him a draw Spurs! Maradona 10 minutes ) Spurs! they rush back to the wall 1... Spurs drew 1-1 at the Emirates before the decisive second leg, spectator! The fourth time that Tottenham were crowned League Cup winners Sugar to be fun! Defending Champions of the trophy, having beaten Arsenal in the 2007 final 's trophy... So blind People could laugh at Spurs What is the shortest book in the world and reportedly cost 1 to!