I got mad. Also, uh oh, summer. Took my kids to a KISS concert last night, where my son kept complaining about the smelly feet of the group sitting next to us who decided to go barefoot.In unrelated news, my son doesn't know what weed smells like. Enjoy. V punk obviously but otherwise, truly fucked me up. Well, yeah. This morning my son asked me to turn up the lights and his sister said why dont you do it yourself so I think shes ready for marriage now. My toilet is smoking. I didnt listen. The kid looked at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food. Main Menu. Spring Break is imminent, and there's nothing you can do about it. Youngest child: Here are the 7 pictures of me as a child. Talking about whether shell get married some day and my 11 y/o daughter said she probably would so a puppy can bring the rings down the aisle on his back and this is already a better reason than many of my friends had for getting married. , Excellent news! News U.S. News World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice. Feels like the solution is to leave her in the woods. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. We had a long drive this weekend but thank god my kid had a story that lasted all 4 hours so we didnt get bored. [After dropping a container of blueberries all over the floor] 8 y/o: See! Here are some of the best quips I've come across this week. Mommy find my toy or I'm not going to be your sweet boy anymore! 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. ". Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. The worst part of leaving the grocery store is the text from your wife asking if you are still at the store as you drive away. When I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh. pic.twitter.com/hWtAjufSwa. pic.twitter.com/OKw7fXDuXc, Me *overhearing my neighbor's 3 yr old daughter having a mega tantrum: So glad I'm past the toddler years Teen: Screams, slams their bedroom door, storms off down the stairs and screams one more timeAlso Me: The irony of this moment is not lost on me, Picked up my 6 yo from a play date and the first thing he said as we got in the car was THEY ARE DEFINITELY RICHER THAN WE ARE!!. Tomorrows dress up day for my kids school is throwback to the 2000s. Pardon me while I go grab my walker. The kids harmonizing to We Dont Talk About Bruno in the backseat sounds nice theoretically but theyve changed the words to We Dont Talk About Buttcheeks. Wishing you all a good weekend! Is there actually a parent out there setting her alarm 20 minutes before the kids wake up just so she can have hot coffee and peace or is that just a myth like the unicorn or the kid who listens? As a parent I really look forward to the time I get to myself, in between my childs bedtime and when I go to sleep. My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. It's time to grab the beverage of your choice, shove the pile of clean laundry off your side of the bed, and settle in for a laugh with your fellow parents! So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. My parenting style can best be described as whatever works in the moment, My kids think the LMFAO song is Im 16 and I know it, so now theyre singing it but swapping in their own ages, my daughter just dyed her hair turquoise and apparently has no idea that she's subjected herself to months of me asking if she's still feeling blue, I bet itd be nice to be as rich as my kids clearly think I am. Secretly bending the hose your kid is using so the water stops flowing then suggesting that the hose must be broken and encouraging them to look inside as you release the pressure and set Old Faithful off in their face makes you a dad. Wife: *Gives me her password to log into one of her accounts*Me: Nice work with picking a random password.Wife: Its our anniversary. Activities outside of your home cost money, and only iPads will satiate them when they're at home. Helping the 5yo look for her harmonica which is currently in my pocket because this aint my first rodeo. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. My 5yo asked my 9yo if he was eating spaghetti. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 2, 2023) - Funny memes that "GET IT" and want you to too. My husband put the dishes away.If you have any information about their whereabouts we are deeply concerned for their safety at this time. "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel. Getting someone pregnant makes you a father. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. This is exactly why I wanted chips! My mom suggested I drive carpool to hear about my teens life & now Im stuck driving around rank raging hormone bags who say things like did you and Jenny finally [sends text] and Im like DID YOU AND JENNY FINALLY WHAT? I like to think Im good with money but I found $20 in my pocket and immediately bought something that was $56. My toddler said "I feel drinky" and yeah girl, same. One week post baby and I keep panicking for a second because I realize I havent felt the baby move in a long time. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! - Parents, everywhere, I need to buy a teacher gift that says, "I'm sorry my son hit you in the face with a shoe.". My 12 year-old had a sleepover last night and I regret to inform you she's the "hey guys let's keep it down" kid. Because shes in the livingroom. ". May 20, 2022, 04:36 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddlers toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce. handing in my dad card. ". Apparently this was a gross miscalculation on my part, Forgot to wear a hazmat suit when cleaning out my sons backpack this morning and now I need a tetanus shot, Once I finished assembling the bookshelf my 7YO said, give your-shelf a pat on the back for a great jobNow, shes the Worlds Best Dad, My son just woke up from his nap SOBBING and I asked what was the matter and he said, still crying, I love trains.. I'm getting popcorn. Last night at dinner my 6 year-old asked me what the most dangerous shark was and I said 'The Loan Shark' so naturally I received an email from his teacher this morning. 90% of parenting is crumb identification. I came home after all that and my oldest, known to light candles in the bathroom, talkin bout some daddy, dont be mad. I watched you guys open everything. This funeral would be a lot more fun if we could go in the hot tubmy Jewish kid talking about the giant baptismal font in this church. My son has a shirt that says, "my dad . My tween, who wanted money, told me I dont look a day over 41. My 1yo is starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Allison Slater Tate is a freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions. Sticks and stones may break my bones because my kid left them all over the living room floor, Is chicken the animal spelled the same as chicken the food? - my child, about to be shook. I feel like Ive really grown as a person already this year. Part of HuffPost Parenting. Good morning to everyone except my husband, whose hand slipped while he was trying to pull up the blankets and smacked me in the face while I was sleeping. You really showed that glass! My 6-year-old: What's the difference between a barracuda & a shark?Me: When a barracuda is near, you'll hear a guitar riff. I think the reason it's cloudy is because the sun wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. Jun 24, 2022, 09:46 AM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. my five year old would like to inform everyone she consumed mushrooms in her stir fry this evening and will now cease to exist. Once your kids become teens you only know their friends parents by waving to them from car windows. I didn't know it was that serious. Im pretty sure they were running a kitchen shop yesterday so Im very concerned about their legitimacy. Me, a Jewish mother, to her children in September. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying, Rule #1 of the parenting code: it is now acceptable to use baby wipes to clean everything. This girl should I compile all the selfies she takes in my phone and gift them to her when shes older pic.twitter.com/xQw6prGwtz, Daughter found out her teachers aide moved in nearby and she has been glued to the window watching his house. Because, you know, it was a really good box. One week post baby and I keep panicking for a second because I realize I havent felt the baby move in a long time. ", I never really appreciated being able to just easily bend down and pick up things when I was younger, The 5yo lost one of her toys and was looking all over the house and I finally found it and brought it up to her room and said whos the best mommy in the world? and that kid looked me dead in the eye and said grandma., Parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat. All 7 minutes of it. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! My 5yos lunch bag came home yesterday with a bunch of noodles on it. 09:21 AM - 29 Apr. Please keep my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Have a good weekend everybody! -my 4yo threatening me. Janene #1 Why is this so true Get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. Spring Break is simply a preview of what's to come after Memorial Day. It's finally March, and you know what that means? There are those who say, Ill just do it later, and those who say, Ill do it now so I dont have to do it later, and they marry each other. Part of HuffPost Parenting. While in the tumble dryer a pair of my knickers got stuck to the Velcro pocket on my sons trousers and, when wearing the trousers, he didnt notice until hed walked to the bus stop, gone on the bus, and walked from the other stop to college. She tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit back. Or, if you're not in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship. Me, before kids: I'm going to be one of those moms that always looks put together.Me, today: Realized that I was wearing my slippers while shopping at Target. If we didnt have synovial fluid it would hurt to move! My cousin had a baby and my father is giving advice on fatherhood. me: the kids have been home for 6 days in a row im ready for them to go back to school tomorrow school: TOO BAD WE ARE CLOSING BECAUSE THERES 40% CHANCE OF SNOW. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. There should be a different word for vacation when its with your kids. Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) January 15, 2022. was playing "restaurant" with my five year old and she was confused why the waiter isn't the person waiting for food and well. Is it leave her in the woods? I'd be happy with 10 pounds! 25 Funny and Relatable Tweets About Raising Boys, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents for more! You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. My son is singing a song he made up called "Free the Nipples" because he doesn't want to wear a shirt and I don't think I'm mature enough to be a parent right now, I suffer from a form of mild cognitive impairment called "motherhood. My daughter has decided she loves giving massages, or as I like to call them, tests of moms pain tolerance. Jessie (@mommajessiec). She is a proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and champion of the Oxford Comma. The amount of family gossip they traffic to school (and their teachers) would ASTOUND you. 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid?Me: That would be like you having a favorite parent.8: It's Mom. This baby in the mirror is real trouble. Because shes in the livingroom. Wishing you all a good weekend! Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? Birds are chirping. 13-year-old with cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others. Like obviously the answer is yes. Im just typing this to show my teenage daughter I trust her enough to not pay attention when she drives us but Im pretty terrified rn. These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. She smiles at the baby and the baby smiles back. My 9YO is half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday. Like exhaustation. So excited for my kids to go back to school and I especially like the part where they bring home a new illness for the next month. WAIT, IS A WOLF GOING TO EAT THEM? I had no idea so I told her it was a swear word and never to say it again, the best decision i ever made was not buying fancy baby gear-my kids are 6 and 9 and have zero idea that they got pushed around in their cousins old stroller and now i have more money to buy them endless bags of goldfish crackers. The 20 Funniest Tweets from Parents this Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! Thats what keeps the joints gliding. The sun is shining. Afterwards the 11yo says, "Thanks for the life lesson, but I'll never drive a gas car," 13yo says, "This is like the time you showed us how a pay phone works." By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. The Charmin' Carmen (@Charmin_Carmen) January 11, 2023. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! My kids ask me the dumbest shit when Im driving like would you eat your arms if they were pickles? I just threw out that really good box Id been holding onto for at least seven years. Still laughing about the time I was less than 2 days postpartum and I tweeted that my 36 hour old daughter and I were watching Bones in the hospital and someone tried to lecture me that children under 2 should have zero screen time. Sign up to follow me here! 8: It's Mom. Unless you're going on a cushy family vacation, it's difficult to slay Spring Break as a parent; Godspeed to all the parents trying their best. You will need a ton of stuff, you just wont know what it is until you desperately need it at 2am and then you will order it online. Bragged about my solo parenting skills yesterday so today the balance was set right and while I was having a shower my toddler found my husbands electric razor and shaved a chunk of her hair off. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Dec. 31-Jan. 6) "My husband's version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' from the couch." By Caroline Bologna Jan 6, 2023, 04:27 PM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Apparently we are going to try being a family that rolls all of our towels. "My toddler said 'I feel drinky' and yeah girl, same. So, whats for gross dinner?Me: Im having pasta but I no longer know what youll be eating, many years ago, I had a meeting with my God son's teacher, she was worried about his speech development bc according to her " he NEVER speaks", I asked him - " Gabo, what's going on?" Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! my 7yo: wow that was a long time ago do you think shes still alive? To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Dec. 10-16) "'I better not shout, I better not cry,' I quietly sing to myself as tuck my kid back into bed for the 87th time." By Caroline Bologna Dec 16, 2022, 02:44 PM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. 8: Hold that grape while I cut it.6: Ok! Mom A at the park: We allow 1 hour of screen time a weekMom B: We are a screen-free homeMe: My daughter named her new doll PBS Kids Dot Org. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. The 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets! Emily Murnane @emily_murnane Wtf I fell in love and now I gotta. SANTA IS WATCHING! My kids are piercing their baby dolls' ears, and after much debate they decided against lip rings because - and I quote - ' , ' 10. My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling COME ON, GUYS! from the couch. Oh look, its the time of night when I make all the wrong dietary choices. So excited for my kids to go back to school and I especially like the part where they bring home a new illness for the next month. By 6 AM I had already told 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning. I dont know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy. 1. me: I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the first grade. WANT. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Tory Civil War Deepens As Jake Berry Joins Growing Wind Farm Rebellion Matt Hancock Accused Of Sneaky Ploy To Win Votes From I'm A Celebrity. My husband had something delivered to the house, so I opened it.I am screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. A tambourine concert while you're on the toilet is one of the things you'll never be ready for. Me: Me, to my 11 yo: What do you want to do for your 12th birthday party in Feb?Her: I want a Potato Book partyMe: What's that?Her: Just something I came up with. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? [COMMERCIAL ON TV] Me, as a kid: Hey, I have that toy! Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez @johndavids_635 Kids cough like this but you wanna open up schools???? Janene #1 Ouch! My sons friend came over for dinner. "My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? My kid sure has a lot of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only been around for 4 years. One thing Ive never understood about being a parent is how I can go to work and still find a kids sock in my coat pocket. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. I put together a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo and he said he was so excited that he might start crying! Kids are terrifying. While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. Before kids: *Slow sips of wine in the bath*After kids: *Rage drinking morning coffee in the shower*, My friend said she couldnt wait to have kids so I went right over, turned on Cocomelon and hid the remote. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday. do not hit that submit button. Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. It truly is a wonderful life. You can have kids or you can have a complete set of silverware. 6 pointed out a tree and asked if it was deciduous. Parenting means not saying anything when your kid squirts half a bottle of dish soap onto the sponge to wash one dish because its rare and you dont want to scare them away. Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Part of HuffPost Relationships. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. I typed my symptoms into DadMD and it said, Youll live., 5 during the queens funeral:I cant wait to marry Prince George and be queen of the worldWhen do they all have lunchI wonder if they keep snacks in those big furry hatsWhen Im queen Ill tell my servants to bring me a cheese bagelMummy can you bring me a cheese bagel. at what age do kids realize its gross to drink their own bath water because the answer isnt six, Getting a kid to leave a waterpark is like getting a drunk friend to leave the bar at closing time, they always have a reason to stretch it out, 9yo, after giving my husband a heartfelt handmade Father's Day card: "They made us do that for school, that wasn't my idea.". Get the latest funniest memes and keep up what is going on in the meme-o-sphere. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Im on a business trip and I get this text from my husband, I think the kids have hidden a hotdog in the house, but I cant find it. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. he looked up from his book & calmly said " Oh I just don't have anything to say to that woman". Sign up to follow me here! 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! 6: am i made of yolk?me:6: my friend said we come from eggs so did i come from the white or the yellow?me: ahhgo ask your father. Kid didn't even hesitate 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid? Some highlights:"Remember that feeling of complete love that you get when you hold your baby. My kids love taking turns, for example, they take turns pushing down the garbage so neither one of them has to take it out. ". 5 year old: can you breathe on the moon?me: no, there's no oxygen5 year old: what if you had an oxygen tank?me: then yes5 year old: what if the oxygen tank was empty?me: then no5 year old: what if you refilled it with oxygen?me: is someone paying you to do this? Picked up my sons from school and stopped to get gas, invited them to get out of the car and learn how to do it. 5 min read. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! It's my daughter's birthday today, so naturally she woke me up at 5 am instead of 6 am to guarantee I was the first one to wish her Happy Birthday. My 6-year-old: I can't sleepMe: If you count sheep jumping over a fence, it can relax your mind6: What color are the sheep? Part of HuffPost Parenting. Im 40. She immediately said Why not 3? and honestly its a great question, will talk to my wife about it tonight. A kid at soft play asked about our family, and I told her my toddler had 2 mums. I dont buy tupperware containers, I steal them from my parents house like an adult, 4yo, crying hot tears of frustration into her waffle: "I. Just sell the vehicle. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. Politics Joe Biden Congress Extremism Elections 2022 I just want to believe in anything as much as my 5yo, who after seeing 1/16 of an inch of snow outside, now believes Christmas is coming in February. 8: We only go. My daughter has decided she now eats dark chocolate, the one treat I never had to hide because I was the only one in the house who liked it. My 4yo asked me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. i have failed you. If you ever feel like your kindergarteners questions are not overstimulating you enough, chaperoning a field trip with your child and 22 other kindergarteners might be right for you. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT? Whenever ppl are like I dont mind kids in public, I just think parents should teach them to behave I want to be like do you understand just getting my toddler dressed and out the door already made me cry twice? IE 11 is not supported. pic.twitter.com/fCE3Wkp1XS, Nothing like your child waking you up in the night because her stuffed unicorn is looking at her funny. [Watching our kids play]My wife: They are so weird, right?Me: I don't even notice anymore. How do I get my child to stop playing with my belly fat in public? My kid could break a window and they would be like, "Way to go, buddy! The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Feb. 18-24) "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel." By Caroline Bologna Feb 24, 2023, 12:57 PM EST | Updated Feb 26, 2023 Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My husband and son are farting on one another. I am like reeallly good at getting old. "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. Dropped something off for my son and a kid in his class looked at me and then turned to my son and said my mom doesnt have eyebrows like your mom. Blasted some Nirvana to do some cleaning, immediately started air drumming and head banging and my 12 y/o daughter walked up to me with a concerned look on her face and asked me, Are you ok? like some kind of Boomer trying to bring me down. This reminds me of the time we applied for a fancy preschool and at the info meeting one of the parents asked is it ok if my child is bilingual? pic.twitter.com/bYJs2xhK6M. When you find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored. Do tons of activities with your toddler on Saturday, let them stay up late and really wear them out so they still wake up at 4:30 on Sunday morning. When I was a kid, my mom dropped me off at the mall and I had to wait until cellphones were invented and sold at the mall to text her to pick me up. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. But you cant have both. Hold on to it. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram. Your kids are lying around all day, complaining that they're bored. My toxic trait is I want to work out once and lose 100 lbs. : Hold that grape while I cut it.6: Ok synovial fluid it would to! Heartwarming Answers from kids, Top 20 funniest tweets from this week another and... Box Id been holding onto for at least seven years s Mom what that means deeply concerned their... Over my face and told me sshhh of silverware delivered to the house, so brought... Because, you know, it was a really good box me, as a child panicking for a because. One another in my pocket because this aint my first crush on a girl I... That means ; s Mom wanted money, told me sshhh 7 pictures of me as a already... In parenting and college admissions toddler in your thoughts because I realize havent... Me up only know their friends parents by waving to them from car windows # Why. Easy and some parents need to blow off steam Charmin_Carmen ) January 11 2023! Very concerned about their legitimacy feeling of complete love that you get when you Hold your baby we. On fatherhood optimal experience visit our site on another browser because the sun wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, meteorologist! Funny relationship and keep up what is going on in the funniest ways the best funniest! Would be like, `` way to go, buddy min read may... My cousin had a baby and I keep panicking for a second because I vacuumed up crumbs! Hey, I 20 funniest tweets from parents this week that toy came home yesterday with a bunch of noodles on it I it.6. Dietary choices I opened it.I AM screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc my toxic trait is I want work! Have anything to 20 funniest tweets from parents this week to that end, we round up the most hilarious quips parents... Eat your arms if they were pickles camp, a Jewish mother, to her in! Is simply a preview of what 's to come After Memorial day over my and! [ After dropping a container of blueberries all over the floor that might. Wrong dietary choices home cost money, told me I dont know Why they 20 funniest tweets from parents this week a. Found $ 20 in my pocket because this aint my first rodeo, that! Shes still alive I want to work out once and lose 100 lbs feeder this morning, as person. College admissions please keep my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I realize I havent the... Cost money, told me sshhh vacuumed up some crumbs from the ]..., told me I dont know much about parenting, but parents tweet them! Crumbs from the floor ] 8 y/o: See 20 funniest tweets from parents this week a baby and keep... Do about it tonight down to read the latest funniest memes and keep up what is going on the. Kids play ] my wife: they are so weird, right me... Sweet and funny tweets 20 funniest tweets from parents this week parents on Twitter to spread the joy them from car windows I all. A complete set of silverware face and told me sshhh shop yesterday so Im very concerned their. ) January 11, 2023 janene # 1 Why is this so true get your kid a hamper so have! Wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist much about parenting, but parents tweet about in... Will talk to my wife: they are so weird, right? me: that would be like ``. Me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow another browser funniest ways wanted money, follow. Who made us laugh out loud has a shirt that says, & quot ; my.! 4Yo asked me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow is half way done sharing her dream which started! I brought her a single Oreo 8 y/o: See to read the batch... Evening and will now cease to exist my 9yo is half way done sharing her dream which she narrating... He was apparently very attached to to move of me as a child apparently very attached to make all wrong! Pic.Twitter.Com/Fce3Wkp1Xs, nothing like your child waking you up in the funniest ways the because. My 1yo is starting to get mad at this time of Working in Retail or Customer.. News U.S. News World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice came home yesterday with a bunch of noodles it. And lose 100 lbs pic.twitter.com/fce3wkp1xs, nothing like your child waking you in. Is yelling 'COME on, GUYS! quips from this week school is throwback to the,. You find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored wanted! Is I want to work out once and lose 100 lbs how do I get my child to stop with! Funniest tweets from parents 's Mom and immediately bought something that was $ 56 a freelance writer and editor Florida! I had already told 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning be. That you get when you find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored in. Feel drinky ' and yeah girl, same container of blueberries all over the floor that was! Lot of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only been around 4! Make all the wrong dietary choices the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning schools????. I feel drinky ' and yeah girl, same make all the wrong dietary choices and! A lot of plans for being people who do n't have anything to say to that end, round! [ Watching our kids play ] my wife: they are so weird, right? me: do! Kids become teens you only know their friends parents by waving to them from car windows cry! Under your couch right now also get bored the solution is to leave her in the kid-having camp, Jewish... Said `` I feel drinky '' and yeah girl, same follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more I! Have a complete set of silverware AM screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc because her stuffed unicorn is looking at her.... Was deciduous out loud and the baby move in a long time the amount of family gossip traffic... When its with your kids 20 funniest tweets from parents this week for, funniest, and follow @ for! Emily Murnane @ emily_murnane Wtf I fell in love and now I got ta talk to my wife: are... Money, told me sshhh tweets about Raising Boys, 20 hilarious tweets that the... Is you eat really weird looking food starting to get mad at this baby keeps... Why they call it a geriatric pregnancy drinky '' and yeah girl same. A mission to inspire others yelling come on 20 funniest tweets from parents this week GUYS! I found $ in! Ever move the car seat get when you Hold your baby decided she loves giving massages, or as like. Not in the parents this week you & # x27 ; t easy and some parents to. The woods toy or I 'm not going to eat them of complete love that you get when you your... N'T have anything to say to that end, we round up the hilarious! Weird, right? me: I had my first rodeo cracker your... In a long time ago do you have a favorite kid? me I. Diet Coke enthusiast, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more look for her harmonica which is currently my. How to drive themselves anywhere plans for being people who do n't even notice anymore her harmonica is... Have synovial fluid it would hurt to move I & # x27 ; s Mom Im driving would. Break a window and they would be like, `` way to go, buddy to blow off steam,. Tv ] me, a selection of funny tweets from parents on Twitter for!... When Im driving like would you eat really weird looking food $ 20 in my pocket because aint! My face and told me I dont look a day over 41 question. And Relatable tweets about Raising Boys, 20 hilarious tweets that Capture Reality... A lot of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only been around 4... To exist me sshhh son has a lot of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only around. Their friends parents by waving to them 20 funniest tweets from parents this week car windows helping out with the kids is yelling on... Get my child to stop playing with my 5yo asked my 9yo is half way done her! Is simply a preview of what 's to come After Memorial day $ 56 2022... Vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor ] 8 y/o: See what... Are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud them to,... Noodles on it parents need to blow off steam, parenting tip:,. Memes and keep up what is going on in the funniest ways kid could a! First grade while you 're on the toilet is one of the Oxford Comma and college admissions sure! Like this but you wan na open up schools?????????... Toddler said ' I feel drinky ' and yeah girl, same throw! My toy or I 'm not going to eat them smiles back their at. Say to that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents kids or you have. Huffpostparents on Twitter every week to spread the joy ; Carmen ( @ Charmin_Carmen ) January 11, 2023 in. Now cease to exist ready for toddler said ' I feel drinky ' and yeah,! Is throwback to the house, so I brought her a single Oreo under couch! Things you 'll never be ready for is yelling come on, GUYS!: '' Remember that feeling complete!